Your Habits Will Either Make You Or Break You

Depending on what [your habits] are, our habits will either make us or break us. We become what we repeatedly do.

―Sean Covey

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The Power of Habits: How They Shape Our Lives and Relationships

Sean Covey’s quote, “Depending on what [your habits] are, our habits will either make us or break us. We become what we repeatedly do. What we call each other ultimately becomes what we think of each other, and it matters,” is a profound statement about the role habits play in our personal development and our interactions with others. This article delves into the meaning behind this quote, exploring the core concepts, principles, and interpretations that can help us understand the true power of habits.

The Meaning of the Quote

At its core, Covey’s quote emphasizes the idea that our habits—the actions we perform regularly, almost automatically—have a significant impact on our lives. They are the building blocks of our character, shaping who we are and how we relate to the world around us. The quote is split into two primary ideas: the effect of habits on our personal development and their impact on our relationships with others.

Personal Development: The first part of the quote, “Depending on what [your habits] are, our habits will either make us or break us,” suggests that the quality of our habits determines our success or failure in life. Positive habits, such as discipline, kindness, and perseverance, contribute to personal growth and success. Conversely, negative habits, like procrastination, laziness, or negativity, can lead to self-destruction.

Influence on Relationships: The latter part of the quote, “What we call each other ultimately becomes what we think of each other, and it matters,” highlights how the language and labels we use for others influence our perception of them. This underscores the importance of positive communication in nurturing healthy relationships. The names or descriptions we use repeatedly can solidify into lasting perceptions, affecting how we view and treat each other.

Core Concepts

1. The Power of Repetition: At the heart of the quote is the concept of repetition. Covey is pointing out that what we do consistently, even in small ways, accumulates over time to shape our identity and outcomes. This ties into the idea that small, positive habits can lead to significant life changes.
2. Habitual Mindset: The quote also speaks to the idea of a habitual mindset. Our thoughts and actions become ingrained in our behavior through repetition. This means that our habits not only affect our actions but also our thinking patterns and attitudes.
3. Impact of Language: The way we talk to and about others is also a habit. If we habitually use negative labels or derogatory terms, it can harm relationships and reinforce negative perceptions. Conversely, positive communication can build trust, respect, and mutual understanding.
4. Personal Responsibility: Implicit in Covey’s statement is the principle of personal responsibility. We are responsible for our habits, and by extension, the outcomes they produce. It encourages self-reflection and conscious effort to develop habits that are constructive rather than destructive.

Principles and Interpretations

1. Self-Improvement: The principle of self-improvement is central to this quote. It encourages the cultivation of good habits that align with our goals and values. This involves regular self-assessment to identify habits that need to be changed or strengthened.
2. Mindful Communication: Another principle is mindful communication. Being aware of the words we use with others can help foster more positive interactions and relationships. It’s a call to practice empathy, understanding, and kindness in our daily conversations.
3. Consistency Over Intensity: Covey’s quote also suggests that consistency is more important than occasional intense efforts. Small, consistent actions are more impactful over time than sporadic bursts of effort. This applies to both personal habits and the way we interact with others.
4. Transformational Power of Habits: The transformational power of habits is a key interpretation. By consciously choosing and maintaining good habits, we can transform our lives and the lives of those around us. This transformation is not instantaneous but the result of sustained effort.

Sean Covey’s quote is a powerful reminder of the significance of habits in shaping our lives and relationships. It urges us to be mindful of our daily actions and the words we use, as they have the power to build us up or break us down. By cultivating positive habits and practicing thoughtful communication, we can create a life of purpose and positive influence, both for ourselves and those around us.